One And One Makes Five

And That Was Christmas Speeding By...

2011-12-30T09:55:00.000Z

I can't quite believe that Christmas is over and done with after all that preparation. The trees are still up, looking slightly embarrassed with bare bottoms now the presents have gone but it's clear the celebrations are over. I feel like I need another holiday to get over it all to be honest.

The kids were all pretty good over Christmas to be honest. No real melt-downs about 'we usually do this' - a few strops over not watching Dr Who on Christmas Day but other than that, they did remarkably well. Sighs of relief all round but I am left wondering whether Christmas has definitely lost some of its magic for kids. I remember the almost knicker wetting excitement of 'the big day', squealing with excitement over every present and wow, how can all these gifts be for me all in one go?! But it just doesn't seem the same now.

Of course, I am prepared to believe it might be the kids I live with are just a) a little thoughtless or b) a lot lazy but sniffy comments about 'there's not as much in my stocking this year' from step-daughter (despite the fact that in money terms, she had the most in hers!) and just the lack of regard shown for new items makes me wonder really. Step-son (who is a little 'glass half empty') commented that because he didn't get Pokemon Pearl, it had all been a bit of a disappointment. Am left feeling disheartened.

Is that why Christmas feels like it comes and goes so fast? Because there's no real magic in it any more, real life crashes back in so quickly that it's past in the blink of an eye. Or is is just because these three kids are getting older that the excitement of their younger years has worn off and try as adults might, you just can't find a way of gift-wrapping that.

Twas Four Nights Before Christmas...

2011-12-21T15:13:00.000Z

Ahh, Christmas - that time of year that we all revert to type and traditions. You might not be able to survive without Twiglets, Twister and the Queen's Speech or the thought of Christmas with the family might send you screaming to a luxury hotel in the country. Whichever it is, it's a safe bet most of us have pretty set ideas about what 'Christmas' entails.

Son and I have spent the last few years resolutely making new traditions and keeping to some I remember from my childhood. For us, opening stockings cuddled up in bed on Christmas morning is a must as is Christmas Eve nibbles and games with friends. It's how he remembers the last few years and there are a lot of special memories wrapped up in there for me too. I'm all about the cooking - I love hunting through recipe books, planning the feast and spending the few days before Christmas up to my armpits in stuffing, cakes and other edible goodies.

So, this year is quite the culture shock and I won't lie and say it's feeling very easy. New Man and his two have their own traditions, all wrapped up in memories of their Mum and a very strong sense of 'this is what we do' that's hard to get past. Son of mine is equally sure that our ways are the best and he, understandably, wants his Christmas to be at least partly his.

And four nights before Christmas, I'm still not sure what we'll do so am fighting my tendency to plan things and am thinking that just going with the flow might work, even if it causes a few little niggles come the big day. Trying to assimilate traditions and expectations is tough and I don't know that I have the answers today.

Perhaps I'll find them in my stocking...

Welcome...

2011-12-18T19:17:00.000Z

So, I've been meaning to start this for ages and a few months after the thought first flickered through my mind, I've finally got around to it. That in itself shows what the last few months have been like. Six months ago, I fell in love with a great, fabulous and, even though he doesn't see it, gorgeous man. I've known him for a few years because his son and my son go to the same school. Being the token single parents in the playground, we've chatted at every sports match, school play and swimming gala and eventually, I plucked up the courage to ask him out for a coffee (I know, how daring am I!)

But, as with the majority of mid life relationships, things are rarely as simple as just falling in love. I come with a son and a divorce, new man comes with two kids who lost their Mum just over four years ago. New man's son also has an amazing array of life threatening allergies and we all have quite a few interesting little quirks that make finding ways to live together challenging to say the least.

In my head, this blog will be a little place for my outpourings - days when everything is perfect, days when everything is hard and days when, like 'normal' families everywhere, things are just something in the middle with ups, downs, arguments about homework and laughs over dinner.

I'm sure the next few posts will be all about catching up on the story of the last few months and then I hope I've not put off any readers so much that you won't stick around to see what 2012 brings the five of us but, if the last few months have taught me anything, it's to just enjoy the moment so for now, I'm going to sign off, smug in the knowledge I've finally got around to starting this thing!